Bank holiday weekend blog update

So cool to read that Sindy in the Guestbook / Chat hasn't felt this at peace with her husband's cross dressing ever since chatting on here in our question and answer sessions.

It is amazing how talking back and forth like this, philosophising, analysing and open communication and adding in some humour does help and glad to see it is helping wives and girlfriends come to terms with Crossdressing.

The whole point of this blog for me is wanting to help fellow crossdressers and their partners see through the shock to some sort of acceptance and understanding… busting some popular myths.

It feels a bit like we're onto something in terms of “Crossdressing” and the trans spectrum and maybe we're discovering it may be outside the Trans world slightly as listen to this from Wikipeedia:

The LGBT community or GLBT community, commonly referred to as the gay community, is a loosely defined grouping of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT)..

Hold your horses now Wiki the “Gay community?” no no no no Trans has nothing whatsoever to do with the gay community.

Also on my own company website I read an article on LGBT within the business I work in where they described the T as being Trans ie people who feel they are the wrong sex and choose to live as the opposite sex which we accept in our business / company.. Woooh hold the horses again this isn't covering Crossdressing, this is covering something more serious than occasional Crossdressing.

It all backs up my view of Crossdressers being outside LGBT. So what is it wives worry about first?

Sexuality – So if we're outside LGBT as mere Crossdressers does that mean wives and girlfriends need not worry about sexuality? After all I don't see Trans as being part of LGB (sexualities) so Crossdressing being distanced from Trans isn't even on that agenda.

Once you stop worrying about sexuality and you realise crossdressing is just a bit of fun, a bit of kink, dressing up not a lot more and a coping mechanism for stress and your husband / boyfriend isn't chasing male attention and doesn't want a sex change all you have to worry about is your other half stretching your dress and laddering your tights.

Other people on the Trans spectrum will hate the above and tell me I'm not a propper Tranny… So what?!! I'm a crossdresser you don't understand it so don't judge it!!

RG Emma and her new image

I'm very jealous about Emma going shopping and changing her image and feeling fab for doing it – Well done Emma I bet your other half is over the moon..

It may not change his crossdressing but it may slow it down as it will be removing a chink of why he crossdresses having you more confident and happy and wearing things he likes to see you wearing and I don't mean to make that sound selfish from a crossdressers point of view but a part of why we dress is compensating for the fact when we get married our other halves make less effort as we've seen Sindy confess … Comfort tut tut lol.

Keep it up Emma nice to see you saying its making you feel better in yourself and nice to see you here taking part in the Blog xx

Understanding Crossdressing?

No one no matter how clever will ever really understand why we crossdress and it's not just covered by men as women crossdress too but you hear less about that as women can do this freely and no one would notice.

From time to time no doubt wives and girlfriends will find the subject a little upsetting but at least some will begin to make some sense of a lot of it and find it a big relief once the main fears are put to bed.

Maddona may have it right here – Liked her when younger and I suppose shes a pretty hot woman now too.. but she doesnt make my list.. :)

Madonna - “What it feels like for a girl” Lyrics
“Girls can wear jeans, And cut their hair short.
Wear shirts and boots 'Cause it's OK to be a boy
But for a boy to look like a girl is degrading
'Cause you think that being a girl is degrading
But secretly you'd love to know what it's like
Wouldn't you What it feels like for a girl”

That does sum the view on crossdressing up for a point of view..

Being masculine is lauded in a woman especially in the business world or where men and women complete for jobs it somehow raises a womans status to be a director or an engineer whereas if a man is a nurse it makes other men chuckle (I don't see why)

Everyone laughs crossdressers because we're degrading ourselves by feminising ourselves?

I don't see it that way at all.

I'm this alpha male man and I like to unwind as a crossdresser but I'm not trying to degrade women or degrade myself just dressing different – We're all born equal just different xy chromosomes and you get nice boobs we get pecs (some get man boobs after a while lol my wife says I now have A cups :() and we have compatible private parts but apart from that we're no different as JFK said “We all breathe the same Air”

So I cringe when I hear the man v women argument but Alpha Male me does have to stick up for men but that's not my real belief my belief is in equality but I also believe women have more options and opportunities than men to be what they want. We're typecast from birth to be alpha males.

It does wind me up in the man v women argument however when women state they are hard done by or try to laud it over men as women can be just like men but then retreat back into “we're women you can't say that to us”.. Discrimination such a one way thing in a lot of instances as we see in politics at the moment but don't start me on politics as ill crash the internet.

Wider Acceptance for Crossdressers?

I would love for crossdressers to have more acceptance and if I could I would encourage people to understand crossdressing more but alas the world is not ready to understand crossdressing we're different we're outside the trans world to an extent as explained above Trans people don't want us and neither does the vanilla world.

I agree with Sindy that most crossdressers are in it for the sexual kick as its part of why I dress the sexy part of dressing ie we're wearing sexy lingerie which we're attracted to on women, stockings and heels and nice makeup and for me long blonde hair trying to make myself look convincing, attractive and sexy and I do feel sexy when fully transformed and it is a turn on, I get horny and … I'll spare the details of what I do when I feel horny as Davina.

Sindy is right - Half the fun is the taboo… It is exciting dressing others having no idea or the rush to get undressed before your wife comes home.. so many times I was dressed thinking I'll stay dressed and let her find me dressed up – my wife said she's so glad I didn't do that lol.
What exactly is so wrong with crossdressing being about sex?

To my mind nothing.. I dress up part of it is a turn on and I admit I get myself off on it but a big fantasy is to have sex with my wife dressed which sadly she says is never gonna happen so I have to accept that.. she says she isn't a lesbian which I take as a compliment.

I think the denial and even propaganda distancing the behaviour from sex is more associated with us crossdressers not wanting wives and girlfriends thinking we only dress for sexy reasons as there is the fun ad relaxation and stress release / escapism also but we distance dressing from us getting off on it or sex as we think on telling you we dress up then get off or want sex with our other halves dressed and you think “Perverts!”

It's been a few weeks since I last dressed up and I've allowed the stubble to grow and become a bit preoccupied with diet and fitness for a bit.. No time to work and get fit and crossdress.. No doubt crossdressing will benefit from a thinner me as I think I look better when I shed a few lbs as a man and as a woman so next time I dress having not done it for a while I know will feel nice and refreshed..

Not sure when I'll get the opportunity to dress. Still hoping for a girls night in with the wife and a dress up session and sort my dresses out but opportunity is rare to get baby sitters and do this.. nice cheap night in tho lol.